Gravity
by CariTwinx
Summary: Izaya is drawn to Shizuo's Gravity, and he can't fight it anymore.   Written while listening to "Gravity" by Sara Bareilles


_Cari here. This is a story I wrote late on night back in august. I had this song on repeat, and was inspired to write a short drabble. Yeah, it's out of character. Surprisingly enough, I have issues writing Izaya in character. Most likely because i'm the complete opposite of his personality. Twinx has an easier time acting his character. Anyways, enjoy this first, crack piece._

* * *

It's so odd to be here, standing in this field all alone. No on is here on this lonely Sunday. Everyone is with their families, and I'm here to want you by my side. I silence is deafening and it hurts. The only things here to comfort me are the trees and the birds. And I still feel so alone.

I wish you were here with me, and not there. I wish you weren't with him. I'm jealous, that he can have you and I can't. I've wanted you for so long. And now I can't have you, because He does.

The feeling keeps coming back. It rips through my chest and makes my heart ache. I can't help but fall to my knees and grit my teeth. The tears sting my eyes as I am flooded with memories.

I remember the way we first met. Our eyes locked, and instantly I hated you. And you hated me too. It was a mutual agreement between us. One that bound us for eternity.

And the first time you actually hit me with that damn machine. I broke a few bones that day, and I saw sheer joy on your face. It made my heart flutter and my stomach knot up. Hatred. That's what I thought it was. I was so naïve.

And the first day you kissed me…I can remember it so well.

I couldn't run anymore. I had been running for almost an hour, and you were still following. My lungs were burning and eyes stung as the cold air whipped into my face. People had cleared the way for us as wel barrel through the city. I dodged your attacks, and you never stopped chasing. I thought I was home free, when I turned down that alley. But I had miscalculated, and I turned into a dead end.

Skidding to a halt, I caught my breathe and looked up, trying to see the fire escape. I leapt, my fingertips brushing the cold iron as your arms wrapped around my waist and pulled me down.

I collided with the concrete, my head slamming again the floor. Starts danced before my eyes and my head spun as I saw your figure over me. I reached for my flick blade but you stepped on my hand, nearly shattering the wrist. I bit back the pain.

"Aah, not so rough, Shizu-chan."

"Don't call me that you damn flea."

Your voice was so gruff, so filled with rage. It excited me. I wanted to respond. I wanted to poke the kindling, blow on the embers. I wanted to restart that fire! But you were too angry, and your strong hands wrapped around my throat quickly.

I was dragged to my feet, gagging and sputtering as you slammed my back against the wall, cracking my head against the brick as you clenched your hand around my neck. My heart raced as the thrill of it all washed over me. But soon, the stars didn't fade, and the blackness started creeping around the edge. I kicked and pulled, trying to gasp for breath, but nothing would break your grip. Tears stung my eyes from lack of oxygen, and the smirk on your face let me know that you planned on ending this feud between us for good.

I wasn't ready to die.

But I accepted it.

I closed my eyes, waiting for hell.

But it never came. I waited in agony, but soon you dropped me and I was able to breathe. I blinked back the tears from my eyes, and looked up at you. You had a scowl on your face, and you caramel eyes glared at me. But I flinched away from the strange warm feeling that radiated from you. I got to my feet silently, trying to read your body language. Your body was stiff and rigid, and I swear I saw you trembling with anger. But you're fists were not clenched, and your scowl was softer than normal.

"Shizuo?" I hiss, rubbing my throat gently as you stood their in silence. We stared at each other intensely as I stepped forward, slightly passing you. We never broke eye contact as I stepped to your right. In fact, you didn't move at all. I didn't know what was wrong. But I wasn't going to let this chance slip through my fingers.

With a grin, I whipped my flick blade around, totally prepared to slide through your cheek an cause you to reel back. I wanted that fire back. This game wasn't over.

I was shocked when your hand gripped around my wrist, pulled it down, and your lips brushed mine. I froze, and my blade clattered to the ground. Your free hand pulled my waist close to you, pressing me closer. My mind was reeling as your lips molded with mine, and I tried to fight back the butterflies and the way my arms wrapped limply around your shoulders. I tried to pull my lips away, but I couldn't.

This fire within wasn't hatred. It wasn't what I believed. This coil in my stomach and this haze in my brain wasn't the pure hate and contempt. It was something so much more sickening. Something so terrible, I couldn't believe I fell so low to actually feel something like this. I wanted the raging fire, not the warm pulse in my heart.

I didn't want to love you.

That night was strange and thrilling. We pulled away fast, wiping away our mouths. I cute your chest, you punched my face. But we left the alley with small smiles and blushes on our faces. And we were never the same.

All the pent up feelings were released, and we couldn't stop ourselves from seeing each other on the streets. But people wondered when we would pass by, and glare at each other, but never fight. I didn't like that. I had to stop it!

"S-shizu-chan. We need to be careful." I gasped as your lips trailed along my collarbone. You're deep chuckle sent shivers up my spine. I clawed at your shoulders, arching my back slightly as I sighed.

"What do you mean be careful? We can't have kids you know." I could feel the smirk on your lips as you trailed lower, kissing my bare chest. I forced myself to pull away and grasp your face in my hands. I stare deep into your caramel eyes and scowl.

"You know what I mean! People…they get curious when we aren't fighting! Hell, the only reason we're able to do THIS is because I have no snooping neighbors!" I whisper frantically, almost afraid that if I don't speak my mind, you'd never hear.

Your lips capture mine, and I'm pulled into your lap. I wrap my legs around your waist as your arms encircle me. We stay in this warm embrace for a moment before you pull away and rest your forehead against mine. We sit in silence, trying to catch our breath. You look at me and smile.

"You wanna play this game? So be it." you growled, causing my heart to flutter.

You shove me back, slamming me against the ground. I recoil in pain as I slam into the hard wood floor. You wrap your fingers around my throat and start to squeeze, and suddenly I can see that fire in your eyes. It's thrilling to see the old you for even a spilt second.

But you end it too soon. You lean down and brush your lips against mine before you get up and grab your clothes, dressing in silence. I sit up, watching as you leave the penthouse and I can't help but feel like crying and smiling.

I didn't see you for a few days. I searched for you, but you never were around. And I felt so strangely alone and cold when I wasn't dodging vending machines, or running from you. I longed for your presence, whether it was love or hate. This feeling inside was tearing me apart. And only you could mend that.

Then one day, you appeared. I was just walking through the streets when I heard the familiar sound of a large metal trash can flying by my head. I turn and see you coming across the street, growling my name. I grinned and fled, feeling my heart soaring as I heard you in pursuit.

Weaving through the streets, people fled and cowered as you picked up anything and everything, and hurled them at me. I only fell when the pole swept under my feet, toppling me over. I rolled onto my back as you prepare to shove the sharpened edge of the sign through my chest. I grab my blade and prepare to attack, when I see that warmth again.

I smile and blink in agreement, suddenly aware of this strange game you have imagined, and I swing my arm up, nicking your chin.

And our deadly game begins.

For hours, we chase each other, always in hot pursuit. And we constantly hurt each other. But the whole time, we can see that this is all just a ruse. A scheme. A way to hide our strange love for each other from the crowd. No one sees as we flinch slightly in dismay as the other winces or grunts in pain. And no one can see the obvious misses and laughs as we dance this dangerous tango. And at night, we capture each other, and spend the night in each others arms, spilling our hearts to each other.

I'm in love with this game. And I never wanted it to end. I was falling into a deeper hole than I realized as I gave myself to you.

I never thought this would end so suddenly.

The tears burn my eyes, and the sobs make my chest hurt. I feel like I'm dying with out you. There is no more air around me. I'm suffocating. It's been three weeks, and I can't seem to let go. I'm still drawn to you. I still walk around, searching for you, even though I know where you are. I hate it, but I have to admit that you are my world, and I'm just the moon. From the moment we first met, I was drawn to you, and my life has circled around you whether I realized it or not. I fell into your gravity. I wanted you. I needed you.

I still do.

"Shizu-chan…" I sob, my voice cracking as the tears fall around me. I wrap my arms around me as I bite back another chocking sob. It's late, and the sun is setting over the horizon. This is the time when you would end our fights, and we would meet in the dark. I wish that I could still do that.

But as I stare at the large stone through watery eyes, I know that it could never be. This game is over. And although you're gone, I'm still drawn here.

I use your headstone as a support as I lift myself from the ground and wipe away the tears. I swallow back the pain and grip the edge tightly one last time, and walk away from the cemetery, wishing that it had been me, instead of you.


End file.
